Woman gives birth to..... block of cheese?

There is no way I could possible do this justice, so I won't even try. At first read I thought that she had actually stuffed the cheese inside herself, but it looks like she was carrying it on her outside. Too bad. Story would be that much better the other way. LINK


Woman Gives Birth to Block of Cheese

Berlin, DE -13 Feb. 2009- A pregnant woman rushed to the hospital to give birth shocked doctors and staff when it was revealed that what she had passed off as a fetus for months was in fact a large block of cheese.

The woman, whom hospital administrators have refused to identify due to confidentiality rules, has a history of mental illness, according to medical records obtained from people close to the situation. Not only has she been detained in the past for public disturbances, but she has been on significant doses of anti-depressant and anti-psychotic medications for many years.

One attending doctor, speaking on the condition that they remain anonymous, remarked that it is not uncommon for some individuals to fake medical conditions in order to gain attention and financial support. Using cheese to fake a pregnancy, however, seems to be unprecedented, even among the mentally ill.

“Beyond weird,” remarked the doctor. “I don’t know how one would do it, but it must take an unwordly level of self deception to even conceive of something like this.”

What’s more, the woman had apparently registered herself at several stores for an upcoming baby shower and had been regularly consulting an obstretician by phone.

With so much contact with others, it is unclear how she was able to keep from revealing herself for so long. According to sources familiar with the matter, all of her neighbors believed her to be pregnant, and had helped her pay her rent and shop for baby clothes and furniture.

Around 4 am on Thursday, after the woman was heard complaining loudly of severe pains outside an apartment building. Neighbors, assuming that she was in labor, took her to an emergency room where doctors uncovered a sodden and moldy mass of what they later determined to be several bricks of cheddar cheese bound together with twine.

Residents of the apartment building refused to comment, and the woman has been detained pending further psychiatric evaluation.

He calls it rape, they call it sport.....

Not to be outdone by the Africans....here's an article from The Daily Times out of Pakistan.

3 women ‘dupe, kidnap, rape’ man in Karachi

* Case registered, police looking for alleged rapists
* Police say man sexually assaulted over four days

KARACHI: Karachi police have registered a case against three unidentified women who allegedly kidnapped a man and raped him over four consecutive days and then threw him near Qayyumabad River in an unconscious state. The case has been registered on a complaint by the victim, identified only as Khalil (23) – who recently arrived in Karachi from Rahimyar Khan and works as a waiter at a restaurant in Neelum Colony, Clifton. On the night of January 27, an identified man ordered Khalil to deliver food to women sitting in a car parked outside the restaurant where he works. “After giving me the order, the man went towards the car. I took the order to the car where the women – two of whom were young and the third was middle-aged – told me that they had recently shifted to the area,” said Khalil. He said the women asked him to deliver food to their house every day, and he agreed. “They asked me to go along with them in the car ... they said they wanted to show me where their house was.” Khalil said the women gave him a ‘glazed sweet’ and once they got to the house, “they gave me milk that had some drug mixed in it ... I fell unconscious after drinking it”. Khalil said when he gained consciousness, he found that the women had undressed him, “and they were forcing themselves onto me”. ASP Asad Raza said the women assaulted Khalil sexually for the next four days, and then threw him near Qayyumabad River. Khalil managed to stop a passing motorist – who took him to Civil Hospital. “His condition is really bad ... his genitals are bleeding and he cannot walk properly,” said Raza. Raza said the women belonged to rich families of Karachi’s Clifton area. “It’s a complicated case ... but we are hoping that we will solve it soon,” he added. faraz khan

So, where does this cross the line from ultimate fantasy come true to "rape"? Probably at the point where his genitals started bleeding. Unless the girls were ugly. Then it was probably rape right from the start.

And how did they keep him going for four days? Even as a willing participant (which is like....all the time) I would probably need chemical assistance to do it enough in four days to make my junk bleed. I'm just saying.